My neighbor recently got a new roof.
As I watched the crew work from the comfort of my easy chair, I gave lots of advice.
Photo by Eric Aiden on Unsplash
"That trailer won't be big enough to haul off the shingles in one trip!"
"You shouldn't be putting the new shingles there - get the old shingles off first so you don't hafta move those big bulky packages twice!"
And on and on.
Truth is, the trailer WAS big enough.
And they proved me wrong on all the other things I thought they were doing wrong.
I'm not a roofer.
Never worked on a roofing crew.
Once I stopped critiquing and started observing, I learned a few things:
- Moving too quickly is dangerous for a roofer. Move deliberately and with intention (this wouldn't apply for, say, a football player in the middle of a game, but could apply to an exercise routine).
- Trust experience.
- Do your job and let the other person do his/hers.
- I ain't an expert at everything. (Pride, take a seat!)
I also wrote myself this note, in the hopes that I’ll remember to butt out more often.
Life is less stressful when I use the "observer" mindset of my previous life as a journalist. Not my job to influence outcomes but to observe, ask questions, and chronicle what happens.
Do you struggle with the need to “fix?”
What might happen to your peace of mind if you chose to observe rather than control?